Avoiding situations. He may try to stay away from places or people that trigger his stress. Creating problems to mask stress. Although counterproductive, a man may create problems to avoid the real issue or to have a greater sense of control. Being angry. Men tend to express anger more easily than other emotions since it is more socially accepted. He may become easily frustrated or start to yell. Blaming others. Because men tend to externalize, a man may blame others for his problems to avoid the feelings of stress. Increasing physical activity. A man may begin to exercise more, play sports, or engage in other physical activities to release tension.
Say something like, “Getting fired is really tough, and I don’t blame you for feeling scared and angry. I’m here for you no matter what. ” Or, “Losing a parent is really difficult. I hope you feel like you can let your emotions out around me. ”
You might say something like: “I’ve noticed you seem a little preoccupied lately. I’m here if you want to talk about anything. ” Or, “You seem a little distracted tonight. Is there anything you want to talk about?”
You can say something like, “I’m sorry your brother said that to you. How did that make you feel?” Or, “Have you talked to your boss about what happened?” Try not to say things like “you’ll get over it” or “don’t worry about it,” since these can make him feel like you’re downplaying his feelings. If he doesn’t want to talk, just sit with him quietly. A gentle question or two might help, but don’t push him to talk if he doesn’t want to.
Not everyone is super into hugs, and that’s okay. If you know he isn’t a fan of physical affection, ask him if he’d be comfortable with a hug.
You could say something like, “I know you’re not feeling great right now, so I just wanted to remind you how much I appreciate you and your handyman skills. You’re always so great at fixing things around the house. ” Or, “You’re such a supportive husband and a great father to our kids. Even when you’re not feeling your best, I know I can count on you. ” Or, “We’ve been friends for 10 years now, and I’ve really appreciated having you in my life. You’ve helped me through so much, so I hope I can do the same for you. ” Talk about past times he’s been able to get through things or past times he’s succeeded. [6] X Expert Source Donna Novak, Psy. DLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 31 December 2020.
You could also say something like, “I know you’re having a hard time right now, and I just want you to know I’m here for you. Text or call me if you need anything. ” Or, “I heard about what was going on at work, that really sucks man. Let me know if you wanna talk. ”
Letting him relax on his own can give him time to work through his emotions if he needs to.
If he’s feeling sick, make him some soup or a hot mug of tea. While this won’t be a cure-all for everything he’s feeling right now, food can be a great distraction.
This is especially important if he is isolating himself or staying inside too much.
Having someone check in on him can help him feel less alone, which might raise his spirits.
Many men are very opposed to seeking mental health help, even if they need it. Try to suggest it kindly and without judgment so you don’t make him feel pressured. Say something like, “I’ve noticed that your mood has been pretty low for a while now. Do you think it would be helpful to talk to a professional about how you’re feeling?”
