“He constantly puts me down, won’t let me hang out with friends, and manipulates me into always doing what he wants. ” “She lies to me but gaslights me into thinking I’m wrong, and she calls me horrible names so I feel bad about myself. ” “They constantly take advantage of me and make me feel guilty for having my own needs. ”
You might send your breakup message to a friend for advice before you send it. They can help you craft the perfect text.
“I feel like this relationship has run its course, so I’m breaking up with you. ” “I’ve decided it’s best to end things between us. ” “I’ve realized this relationship just doesn’t work for me anymore, so it’s over. ” There’s a difference between what your ex-partner needs to know versus what they want to know. [5] X Expert Source Kate DreyfusHolistic Love Coach & Intuitive Healer Expert Interview. 22 November 2021.
As an example, you might be tempted to say, “It really hurts me when you call me names, so I don’t want to be with you anymore. ” Instead, just text, “I don’t want to be in a relationship with you anymore,” and leave it at that. What you went through with them may have been really painful. You don’t have to bottle all of those feelings up. Vent to a trusted friend or family member so someone understands what you’re going through. [7] X Expert Source Kate DreyfusHolistic Love Coach & Intuitive Healer Expert Interview. 22 November 2021.
“I hope you find someone who truly loves you. ” “I wish you all the happiness. ” “I know you’ll meet someone better for you soon. ”
You can always re-read your “why” statement if you start to second-guess your decision. Remember, the love-bombing stage (when narcissists shower you with affection) is temporary.
If you have mutual friends with your ex, you might have to unfollow or cut ties with them, as well. Make sure they aren’t drawing you back into your ex’s web. Going no-contact is important for your well-being and closure. [12] X Expert Source Kate DreyfusHolistic Love Coach & Intuitive Healer Expert Interview. 22 November 2021.
You might go out with your best friend for coffee, or invite several friends out to dinner. Even if you haven’t talked to your friends in a while, still reach out to them. They probably miss you a lot and will be happy to hear from you.
No matter what your ex says, you’re not at fault for dating a narcissist. They’re very romantic at first, and anyone could fall for them.
It’s really common for a narcissist to keep back-up options, so they can easily find a new partner if their relationship falls apart. This is why it’s so important to block them on everything. Not only does it stop them from contacting you, it also prevents them from making you jealous by posting photos on social media of them moving on.
Grieve the end of your relationship and what you wanted from it. Practice self care. Decide what you want in a future relationship. Spend time doing what makes you happy. Try new things.
Look for a therapist online or ask friends for a recommendation. You may also be able to find a therapist through your insurance company.
