Am I really ready to have sex, or am I feeling pressured by my partner / friends? Do I feel comfortable having sex with my partner? Could I have any regrets afterwards? Have we talked about using protection during sex? Do I feel comfortable saying no at any point?

Don’t be afraid to giggle or laugh during sex (as long as you aren’t laughing at your partner). Letting out a little chuckle can really help lighten the mood and keep things fun instead of serious. As you get to know your partner more and figure out what you both like, sex will feel more natural and authentic.

Say something like, “So, we’ve been dating for a little while, and I think I might be ready to have sex. How are you feeling?” It can feel awkward to talk about sex, but by being open and honest, you can make the experience better for the both of you. If you don’t feel like you can talk about sex with your partner, it might be better to wait a while before getting intimate with them. It can also help to talk with trusted friends and loved ones about their sexual experiences. Chatting with people who know what they’re talking about can help you feel less anxious and nervous. [6] X Expert Source Josh Spurlock, MA, LPC, CSTLicensed Professional Counselor Expert Interview. 13 January 2022.

Remember that birth control methods like pills and implants protect against pregnancy, but they don’t protect against STDs. Even if you are on birth control, consider getting condoms or dental dams as well.

If you’ve never shaved before and you don’t want to, consider trimming your pubic hair with a razor or scissors, just to tidy it up.

Keep in mind that if you have a vagina, you don’t need to wash it out with soap. You can lightly scrub your vulva with your hands and some water, but using soap or harsh cleansers can disrupt your pH balance and lead to irritation.

If you aren’t in a sex “mindset,” you might have trouble getting turned on physically when it comes time to do the deed.

You could also listen to a sensual song, do your makeup, or get all dressed up in a new outfit.

You might have some wine or champagne on hand, just in case you and your partner want a drink before getting to it.

Make sure you’re listening to your partner as well. They might tell you what they like and how they like it as you two get intimate. You might say something like, “Let’s start slow,” or, “That feels so nice. ”

Listen to what your partner says, too. They might say no or tell you to slow down, so pay attention.