Try this: Slow things down during foreplay. Give your girlfriend a massage and focus on erogenous zones like her breasts, inner thighs, and neck. [4] X Trustworthy Source Cleveland Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Along the way, dial up the heat with deep, passionate kissing. [5] X Research source
Try this: Make sure she knows you care about her pleasure. Ask for feedback during sex (we promise it’s so much sexier than it sounds). Use an open-ended question like, “How do you want me to touch you?”[8] X Research source
Try this: Double check that you’re not putting pressure on her to orgasm. Hold off on asking her questions like “Did you come?” or “Are you close?” Instead, ask, “What do you want to try?” or “What feels good to you?”[10] X Research source
Try this: Make oral sex a regular part of your between-the-sheets routine. Stimulating their clitoris with your mouth and tongue can make your partner significantly more likely to orgasm. [13] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
Try this: Add manual sex to your repertoire and focus on stroking her clitoris. You can try stroking slightly to the left or right side of the clitoris—most women are more sensitive on one side or the other. [15] X Research source
Try this: Experiment with making eye contact a goal during sex. Eye contact releases bonding hormones that’ll bring you two closer together. For the majority of women, their mental state and emotions are a huge part of arousal. [18] X Research source
Try this: If you’re engaging in penetrative sex, let her go on top. When she’s in the “cowgirl” position, she’s able to better control the angle, depth, and rhythm of penetration. [20] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
Try this: Whether you’re engaging in penetration, oral sex, or manual stimulation, ask her to help you find the pressure and rhythm she likes. Then, stick with it and don’t change it up unless she asks you to. You could also try steadily ramping up the pressure, which some women love. [22] X Research source
Try this: Bring toys into the bedroom. For some women, it’s just harder to orgasm because of their anatomy—not necessarily what you’re doing. Adding in a toy like a vibrator can spice up your sex life and help you out. [24] X Research source
Try this: Experiment with new positions and different types of stimulation. Women can experience different kinds of pleasure and orgasms (clitoral, vaginal, and “blended”). Instead of asking, “Did that feel good?” try asking, “What do you want to try next time?”
Try this: Start an open conversation about your sex life. Ask her what she likes and doesn’t like. Talk about any fantasies or different ways to experiment that might get her excited. [28] X Research source
