“I’m sorry that I got angry with you at dinner last night. It wasn’t the time or the place to talk about these things. ” “I’m sorry that I went through your phone without your permission. That was an invasion of your space. ” “I’m sorry that I didn’t let you see your friends last week. I know they’re important to you, and I’m happy you have them. ”
“I’m sorry I called you that. I was angry, and lashing out, but you don’t deserve to be called names. ” “I’m sorry I threw away your old photos. I just love you a lot, and it’s hard for me to think about you with another person. But what I did wasn’t right. ” “I’m sorry I read your texts. I have a hard time trusting people, because of my last relationship, but I need to work on getting better about this. ”
“I don’t want this issue to get in between us again. That’s why whenever I get these feelings again, I promise to talk to you about them, and not to go behind your back. ” “I know this isn’t the first time we’ve had this conversation. Maybe we could come up with a safeword, so that if things get out of hand, and I get angry and go too far, you can let me know that it’s time to cool down?” “It’s not your responsibility to deal with the lack of trust I still struggle with from when I was with my ex. I’m going to make an appointment with a therapist next week, and am hopeful that I can find ways to not repeat this situation when I’m there. ”
“I know you have a lot of friends, but would you be OK with checking-in on me once in a while during parties?” “We both have a lot going on, but could you try and talk to me just for a little every night, before we go to bed?” “If it’s OK with you, maybe we could have a no phones policy when we have dinner together. It would help me feel like I’m important to you. ”
“Are there things I can do to make you feel more satisfied in our relationship?” “I know this relationship can work, and I want to know if there’s something you need from me for that to happen. ” “I want this to be an open conversation, so big-picture: is there something that you need from me? I want you to know you can rely on me. ”
“I hope I’ve made it clear to you how much I regret what I said the other night. ” “I’ve tried my best to show you how terribly sorry I am for what I did. Now the ball is in your court. ” “If it isn’t clear to you how incredibly sorry I am about this, please tell me. But if you can see this, maybe we can talk about how we can move on from here. ”
Opening: “I’m writing this letter to you because I want to apologize for what I said last weekend at dinner. Nobody deserves being called the things I called you, but especially not you, after all the things we’ve been through and all the support you’ve given me. ” Explanation: “I think that during my last relationship, I always felt insecure and like I wasn’t good enough, and so I’d end up being left behind sooner or later. I lashed out at you because I was scared, but you didn’t deserve that, and it hurts me to know that I’ve hurt you. ” Plan for change: “It’s not your responsibility to deal with my insecurities, it’s mine. I’m going to go talk to a therapist next week to discuss some of my feelings, and I’m doing it because you’re so important to me, and I want for this relationship to work. ” Talk about needs: “I know we had a rough night, but I also know that things can get better. Something that I think I need is to be in closer communication with you. Would it be OK if we spent some time every night talking? It doesn’t matter about what. I want you to know that you can tell me if you ever need anything from me. ” End the letter: “I’m trying to tell you how sorry I am for what I did, and I hope that comes across. If you can, please forgive me. ”
Stock his fridge with his favorite foods Pick up a meaningful gift for him from the store If he’s into sports or music, get him a ticket to a game or concert
“I know things have been a little weird between us recently, but can I take you out to dinner at that new restaurant this weekend? I want to talk to you. ” “Let’s go to your favorite restaurant tonight. It’s on me, I feel like I owe you something. ” “Can we talk for a bit? Maybe we could walk down to the café down the block. ”
We all have ideas about what relationships should be like, but ask yourself if you need to reevaluate yours. It might not be fair to expect that your boyfriend has never had feelings for anyone else, or that you should be the only person he focuses on. [11] X Research source If you need help sorting through your feelings, don’t be afraid to seek help. Talking to a licensed therapist or counselor can be a great way to feel less alone. [12] X Research source
