Aim for a weekly date night. If nights aren’t an option, have lunch or breakfast together at least once a week. The point is to find a time that works. Do activities that you enjoy as a couple. You two might go for a jog, see a movie, do a wine tasting, or swim at the lake for instance.

Get an oil change on their car when you notice it’s time. Let your partner pick the restaurant the next time you go out. Save them the last piece of dessert even though you’d like it. Do a task that your partner usually does and complains about. If you have kids together, ask them to make sweet cards for your partner.

For instance, you might say, “Hey, it’s been a while since we met up for coffee and just talked,” or, “Are you free to have a quick check-in today? I just want to chat about our relationship. "

For instance, your partner might say, “I just need to be able to vent about my day. I don’t expect you to solve my problems—it just helps to have you listen,” or, “I need more physical connection. It makes me feel really good when you come over and give me a hug or we hold hands. "

If you can, have your conversation somewhere quiet, so it’s easier to hear what your partner is saying. Refer back to what you talked about to show them that truly care. Wait a few days after your partner shared their needs and ask how things are going. [6] X Expert Source Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSWPsychotherapist Expert Interview. 27 October 2021. This lets your partner see that you really paid attention and that their needs are important to you.

This is a skill that can take time to develop. If you find yourself interrupting your partner, stop yourself and say something like, “I’m sorry. Please continue. "

You could say something supportive like, “I know it feels like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders, but you’ve got me by your side. "

You could pick up groceries and make dinner on nights when your partner wants to work out at the gym for instance.

Try to incorporate physical affection throughout the day—you could touch your partner’s shoulder or pat their leg as you talk about your day or sit and watch a movie.

Your partner will probably feel more confident and in control of their life if they know that you’ve got their back with anything they want to do.

Be clear with your praise. Say something like, “Thanks for doing more around the house so I could have more time for my project,” or, “You really made my siblings feel looked after when they visited. Thanks for trying so hard with my family. "